Bloody Green Riding Hood
by HanaReiGirl
Summary: Read this incredibly horrible story as Lune is tasked with the mission of delivering a basket of food to her grandmother, while the three innocent wolf-brothers (Fucktard, Bastard and Retard/Kodama/Kodamatard) are dragged into this story for no good reason. (This story is horrible. I WARNED YOU.)


**Ha! I've decided to put Lune in a story, but had no idea what to do, so BOOM. And yes, the title is taken from the Chat's name for Lune. Of course, I will update that chatfic in like, I don't know, infinity days? I'm too lazy and bored of it.**

* * *

"Once upon a time," a bird with a huge white beard began, "there was a really peaceful town. Or not." He stared at the town that you readers possibly won't be able to see, since this is an imageless story. If FanFiction allowed us to put images in, though, and not be a total dick, then perhaps you might be able to see it. "One of the inhabitants there was a cute, little green-haired girl who-"

The bird was suddenly grabbed by a green-haired girl who, smiling wickedly, squeezed the living shit out of the bird. "Did I hear you correctly?" she smirked. "'cute, little green-haired girl'? I'll make sure you regret calling me those pathetic words!" After the bird being put into a state of twitching, she dropped the bird on the floor and stomped on the bird as violently as she could, ignoring the blood that splattered under her shoes. "Aahhhaha, ahahah! AhAHAHAH! THIS FEELS GOOD!"

Another hand arrived, placing itself on the girl's shoulder, causing her to stop. "Lune, stop it... stop killing narrators for no good reason." As Lune twitched, the fragile old man coughed and took out a basket. "Anyways, um, please take this to your grandmother who lives in the forest." He offers it.

"...did you just stop me from destroying this bird?"

The man raised an eyebrow. "Um, ye-"

Lune swung around and took out a knifecutter, stabbing the old man's eyes with it.

"HOLY CHEESE GRILLS! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH- _urk_" the old man, his eyes still bleeding, dropped to the floor. His life had left his body, because holy shit what kind of girl are you!?

"A very good girl." Lune replied to me. You suck, Lune. You suck. "You want to die!?" Don't you have something to do?

She noticed the basket of fruits and food, picking it up.

Then, she smiled in a twisted way. "Huh. So you wanted me to deliver this basket to that goddamn pathetic grandmother who stays in the forest for no good reason? LIKE FUCK I WILL." She dropped the basket to the floor, which miraculously didn't spill anything. Lune froze, and thought for a while. "...wait, I could use her for more target practices." She laughed gleefully as she looked at her knifecutter in the man's eyes, taking it out. "Alright, I'll go, bitch." She began heading for the forest.

Holy crap, this girl is messed up.

* * *

Before entering the forest, she had put on a dark green cloak that made her seem like a gentle, kind-hearted gir- "Shut the fuck up, Tizzy." Lune glares at the sky, probably me since everyone thinks the Fourth Wall is in the sky. Well, screw you, Lune! "Thank you, you fucking bitch." She replies. Rude.

As she walked by, she didn't notice a wolf creeping around. The wolf drooled.

"Whoa, that basket is filled with tasty food!" the wolf howled to himself. Yeah, don't ask. How the fuck do you howl to yourself without getting heard? "...if only the girl had a fine ass though. She looks like a creepy psychopathically psychopathic psychopath." he groans.

Lune stepped up from behind the wolf. "That's because I am one, Mister Kind Wolf." She laughed sadistically, surprising him.

"WHAT THE FU-"

The green-head immediately shoved a knife into his throat, causing his eyes to roll inside his head before he dropped to the floor. That didn't satisfy the prick, though, so Lune continued bringing out the knife and stabbing the wolf's head repeatedly. "AHAH! AHAHAHAHA! Haa... hahahaaa... damn, that was fun." she finally whispered to herself, before continuing her walk.

* * *

"What!?" a wolf with a black sunglass screamed. "Our brother Fucktard is dead!?"

An injured rabbit squirmed under his paws. "Y-yes, sir! I, I saw it with my own eyes!" she screamed. "L-Lord Fucktard was being stabbed by this, this... c-crazy lunatic girl who had green hair and a basket of food!"

Another wolf beside the glassed one drooled. "Food!? Whoooo, now that's something I'd love to have!"

The glassed one spat at the rabbit. "And you just stood there, not helping Fucktard-bro? SCREW YOU." He proceeded to eat the screaming rabbit alive, and stared at his other brother. "Fucktard-bro just got killed and you're wanting food!? What the fuck is wrong with you, Bastard-bro!?"

Lord Bastard shrugged, dismissing all thoughts of his dead Lord Fucktard brother. "Well, when were we ever sane?" he asked. "You expect a rabbit to save a wolf, and we're pretty much named with ridiculous naming sense." Bastard laughed. "I mean, seriously? Who the hell name their kids Fucktard, Bastard, and Retard!?"

Retard dropped his glasses and sighed. "Good point, Bastard-bro. Good point..." Then he smiled. "But at least I made my own fake name- Kodama!" he laughed proudly. "And now, let's go kill the girl- TO MAKE HER SAY SORRY!"

"YEAH!"

"AND TAKE HER FOOD AND A-SESS-SO-RAYS!"

"YEAH!"

* * *

Lune giggled. She walked up to a weird cave. "Hello? Are there any nice wolves willing to donate some flesh in here?"

Bastard crawled out. He grinned. "You! You're the green-haired chick who killed Fucktard, weren't you!?" he asked, before stopping to examine Lune properly. "...damn, you look hot."

"Why, thank you." Lune patted Bastard. Then she took out her knifecutter. "Now please die and donate me some flesh."

Bastard's death was quick.

* * *

Retard/Kodama ran around in panic, not wanting to go out of the cave to face this crazy bitch-ass psychopathically psychopathic psychopath girl. "I NEED TO LIVE, GODDAMN IT." Then he looked to the ceiling of the cave. "Damn you, fate! Damn you destiny! DAMN YOU KATSURAGI!" What a retard. "Shut up, weird disembodied voice! You're not helping!" Oh, excuuuuuse me for being the story creator, you ungrateful prick. "Who the fuck would be grateful after being put inside a story that you're going to get killed in!?" Touché.

He suddenly got a good idea. "I know! I'm just going to pretend to be that chick's grandma so she can treat me well instead of kill me!" he laughed evilly, giving himself a pat on the back. "Best idea ever!"

A random baby bear crawled up to him, then took out a cigarette and began smoking. "Man, even I know that is the most stupid idea ever, yo."

"YOU SHUT UP." Kodamatard kicked the baby bear away, to which a flock of bats above them gasped, because- who the hell dares kick baby bears? "OH FUCK." He muttered.

* * *

Lune reached the house of her grandmother. She smiled pleasantly, as if expecting this to be some kind of pleasurable experience. (No, not like that, you sick fucks... well, actually, I don't know. It's Lune. Who knows?) "Hello, dear grandma~? Are you there?"

"No, get the fuck away, Lune."

"So be it!" Lune decides to just do what her grandma says, because she's bored. And she wants the grandma to beg her to come in and feed her, even though she'll probably just stan the guts out of the poor fragile old lady.

Suddenly, screams. Lune gave no shit. A new voice appeared, which she actually payed attention too. "You bitchy girl... um, ahem, I mean... _Luuuuune-chaaaan, are you there, my sweet granddaughter?_" the voice asked.

"...yes, you fucking worthless grandmother." Utterly disgusted by the voice and compliment she got, Lune stepped inside. She immediately saw through the disguise the wolf had, and laughed mentally. This was going to be fun. "I brought you some food, dear _grandma~_" she said.

"Why, ahem, thank you, dear Lune."

Lune fake-gasped. "Oh, my! Grandmother, what nice eyes you have!"

"The better to see you with, dear."

"What big ears you have!

"The better to hear you with, dear."

Lune smirked. "And, oh grandmother! What nice... _flesh_ you have!"

The wolf laughed. "THE BETTER TO-" he froze. "...wait, what?"

Lune grabbed Kodamatard by the throat, laughing psychopathically. "THE BETTER TO LET ME CUT YOU UP!? THANK YOU VERY MUCH." She took out her knifecutter and proceeded to torture the shit out of Kodamatard.

As he screamed, blood gushing out everywhere, he cried tears. "F-FUCK YOU, AUTHOR! FUCK YOU, FATE AND DESTINY!" Taking in one more deep breath as Lune continued stabbing him, he screamed, "CURSE YOU KATSURAGIIIIII!"

* * *

As she exited the house, she looked into the sky. "What the fuck, Tizzy. This story is so short, I'm pretty sure you've just wasted a bunch of readers' time." She says to me.

Well, yeah, I guess I shouldn't have written this. I mean, it's just a random idea I got.

"Well then..." Lune grinned. "May I help you with something?"

Umm... sure?

"Die." Lune throws her knifecutter up into the sky, as if to destroy this fanfiction.

Wait, stop! STOP THE KNIFE GODDAMN YOU! ...oh shi


End file.
